"When Everything Feels Too Much" A Simple Strategy for Managing Overwhelm in ADHD

One of the phrases I hear most often during ADHD appointments is:

"I just feel overwhelmed."

Sometimes people can explain exactly why.

They have too many deadlines. Their inbox is overflowing. The house feels untidy. There are phone calls to make, forms to complete and appointments to arrange.

Other times, they simply know that everything feels too much, even though they cannot identify a single reason.

If you've ever experienced this, you're certainly not alone.

Feeling overwhelmed is one of the most common challenges people with ADHD describe.

Why Small Tasks Can Feel So Big

One of the things that makes ADHD difficult is that the brain often struggles to decide where to begin.

Imagine standing in front of a wardrobe that has become increasingly untidy over several months.

Some people immediately think, "I'll start with the top shelf."

Many people with ADHD see every item at once.

The clothes on the floor.

The shoes.

The drawers.

The boxes.

The coats.

Nothing stands out as the obvious place to begin.

The result is that the task feels enormous before it has even started.

Stop Looking at the Whole Picture

When people feel overwhelmed, their natural instinct is often to think about everything that needs doing.

Unfortunately, this usually makes the feeling even worse.

Instead, I often encourage people to narrow their focus.

Ask yourself:

"What is the very next thing?"

Not the next ten things.

Not today's entire to-do list.

Just the next small step.

If you need to write a report, perhaps the next step is simply opening your laptop.

If you need to tidy the kitchen, perhaps the next step is putting one plate in the dishwasher.

Progress often begins with surprisingly small actions.

Make the First Step Almost Impossible to Fail

Many people set themselves goals that are so ambitious they feel overwhelming before they even begin.

"I'll organise the whole house."

"I'll answer every email."

"I'll clear all my paperwork."

Instead, make the first step so small that it feels almost impossible not to do it.

Reply to one email.

Wash one plate.

Read one page.

Once people get started, they often continue naturally.

The hardest part is frequently beginning.

Give Yourself Permission to Pause

Another misconception is that productivity means working continuously until everything is finished.

In reality, many people with ADHD work much better in short, focused periods.

Twenty minutes of good concentration is often far more productive than two hours spent feeling overwhelmed.

Short breaks are not a sign that you are failing.

They are often part of working effectively.

Be Kind to Yourself

One thing I notice quite often is that people with ADHD speak to themselves far more harshly than they would ever speak to someone else.

"I should be able to cope."

"Why can't I just get on with it?"

"I'm useless."

If a close friend said they were feeling overwhelmed, you would probably respond with understanding.

You would encourage them to take one step at a time.

You would remind them that everyone struggles sometimes.

You deserve that same kindness.

Progress Looks Different

Sometimes managing overwhelm means completing an important piece of work.

Sometimes it simply means getting dressed, eating breakfast and making it through a difficult day.

Both are forms of progress.

It is easy to compare yourself with people around you.

What we rarely see is the effort that someone with ADHD may already be investing simply to keep everything together.

Recognising your own progress, however small it may seem, is an important part of building confidence over time.

A Final Thought

Overwhelm has a way of convincing us that we need to solve everything immediately.

In reality, the opposite is often true.

When everything feels too much, life usually becomes easier when we make our world smaller rather than bigger.

One task.

One decision.

One step.

I often remind patients that very few problems are solved all at once.

Most are solved in exactly the same way they began.

One small step at a time.

And sometimes, that first small step is enough to remind you that moving forward is possible after all.


Dr James Glass
MBChB MRCPsych
Medical Director, WMI Psychiatry